Wednesday, April 4, 2012

Embracing Uncertainty and Planting a Garden

When Ryan and I decided to move to South Bend we had an entire year or more to figure out the details - where would we live with our giant dog? how often would we travel home? how would the wedding work out? where will I work? etc. all those little details ...

It's been 4 years and 10 months since we moved to South Bend ... and we could be leaving as early as June. 2 months or more.  I was about ready to scream I was so overwhelmed at the prospect of not knowing where we'd be living, let alone what state we'd be moving to, how we'd coordinate the logistics of a move, and packing ..?! Seriously. We have so much stuff in this house it's unbelievable.

Ryan's been so busy working on his dissertation that I felt a little guilty pestering him on a semi-regular basis - Have you applied to any post docs yet? 

Finally he said, "O.k. if you are stressed about it, I am going to feel twice as stressed .. so just relax."

Finally I said, "Would you please just get your applications out so I don't pull out my hair?"

And he did.

He's heard back from 2 of his three applicants, both of which have praised his background and both of which have said not right now or sorry, I don't have the $$.  And we're o.k. with that.

Yesterday afternoon I embraced uncertainty and admitted to myself that it's O.k. if we can't plan out where we'll be living in 2 months, when we'll be moving, how we'll pack up this big ol' (town)house of stuff, when we'll be ready for baby #2, what state we'll be living in ... the answers will come in time, and we'll be ready for 'em!


Our first SFG - Spring 2009
So with one post doc application saying, "not right now ... maybe later ... I'll get back to you in 2 weeks ..." we decided and settled on the fact that we might stay in South Bend through the summer.  The best news regarding that choice?  I get to plant my garden!

I had sort of let our little raised bed go all "a shambles" this spring with the gut feeling that I wouldn't really plant anything until mid April or early May .. but with the warm weather coming on early and this new embrace-ment of uncertainty .. I decided to plant away!

I ran through Home Depot last night out of mere convenience rather than make the mini-trek off course to our local green house (that I love to pieces, by the way - McKinley Terrace Garden Center for those of you 'locals' ;-) hahah) and I picked up a handful of pansies (so cute and so springtime), 2 packs of lettuces, and a long-term summer commitment - a tomato plant!

Typically we plan our square foot garden, rehashing the previous years layouts and carefully planning rotations, tall plants by the fence, fruit-bearing in the sunniest spots, lettuces are usually o.k. in the shady spots ... but this year, out of haphazard last-minuteness I pulled out all of our square foot markers and disregarded almost all of our "rules" .. planting seeds and pansies sporadically throughout our raised bed, tossing pansies in where they'd be cute rather than practical, and loving the feel of our rich black soil caked on my hands ... 

On the list this year - 
Hot peppers
Lettuces x2
Chives (from last year)
Strawberries (2 volunteers popped up from 2 years ago!)
Mammoth Sunflowers,
Pole beans
Hen & Chicks (from Mom's garden about 3years ago)

Thomas watched from inside the house almost the entire time ... I can't wait to share gardening with him. <3

Tada! All planted!
No better way to garden than barefoot. ;-)
Our apartment manager reassured me that we wouldn't have to dig it all up and remove the garden "as long as it was nice" when we moved out ... and that occasionally the maintenance workers will dig up and take out what they want ... and I'm o.k. with that =)


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